Biff and Julie

The ACME Chatters

We’re Back!!

Hi It’s Biff and Julie – The Acme Chatters!

We’re back!! Thanks Justin for your interesting thoughts.  We will check in with Justin sometime in the future again for the gay man’s views on dating.

We wanted to talk a bit about lying in public ads on a dateline.  Our comments would apply equally to chat greetings and on-line profiles.

Is it ever acceptable to out and out lie in your public ad?  And if so what is and is not ok?

Biff: I think it’s ok sometime so long as it doesn’t hurt someone. A man pretending to be a woman is obviously wrong.  We talked about that in an earlier post.  Pretending to be a doctor or a lawyer when you aren’t probably is bad too.

Julie: The big lie is age.  Supposedly everyone lies about there age and I just don’t think that’s right.  You are what you are.  Accept it.

Biff: I agree that if you shave ten or twenty years off your age it’s not right.  But a couple of years seems ok.  Especially if that’s what everyone else does.  If I were 33 and said I was 33, everyone would think that I am forty.  So I should say I am 29 and they will get it right that I am in my mid thirties.

Julie: I disagree. Just say that you are 33 and say that you mean it.  If you simply don’t want to admit your true age you could say something vague like thirty-something or old enough to know better.

Biff: Yeah then everyone would think I was 60.  There’s more to lying than saying something false.  Sometimes failing to state something that is very important would be a lie by omission.

Julie: Like what?

Biff: Like not mentioning that you are currently calling from prison.  I think that would be pretty relevant.
Julie: I guess I would agree there.  Anyway I think you should be as honest as possible and let the chips fall where they may.
What do you think?

To conclude we are including a mini-post submitted by one of the Acme users – Sophie.  Here’s what she has to say.

Hi, I’m Sophie.  I’m a happily divorced mother of 2 grown kids.  Both my kids have been out of the house for 3 years now, so for the past 3 years I have been living my dream life, doing whatever I want without having to answer to anyone.  My divorce was finalized 6 years ago and I have not had a serious relationship since then, but it doesn’t mean I’m not looking!

I started using Acme chat lounge a couple years ago and have met some really interesting people. A couple I have met out for coffee, but I got to admit, I really use Acme chat lounge to have pleasant phone conversations – it’s just something I enjoy to do at night while relaxing at home.

Recently the Acme chat lounge has opened up so I have the option to chat with other people all over the country. And I love it.  I live in Florida, have traveled all over the state…but I have never left the state.  I have met 3 or 4 really nice guys in other states.  2 guys from New York, 1 guy from Alaska and another guy (who I call my neighbor) from South Carolina.
This is perfect for me, I have spent the past couple of weeks selecting a different state each night and then trying to find someone to chat up with!  The accents are fun  (especially my New York guys) and I have learned sooo much about Alaska!  I’m having such a great time, really enjoying the variety of the people I’m meeting!

Thank you Acme, I feel like my circle of friends has expanded and gotten much more interesting because of you.  Someday I hope to visit some of these guys I’ve met in the chat lounge, for now I’m enjoying pleasant conversation and learning about people all over our country!

Anyway that all for now from Biff and Julie – The Acme Chatters.



Guest Blogger Justin – Part 2 – Being Gay on Acme

Hi this is Biff and Julie – The Acme Bloggers.

Hope you like what Justin had to say last week.  Here’s his follow-up.

I am in one of those moods where I really want to be in a relationship.   I called ACME and left the following message in their Men seeking Men category.

“My name is Justin.  I am 22 years old, very good looking, swimmer’s build, just an all around nice guy.  I have a lot of super friends, and a great life, but sometimes, I really think it would be nice to have a boyfriend.   So, I guess, I would say, I am open to whatever happens.    I am tired of the bars, and looking to meet a man who might also want a relationship if everything clicks.   If you are a good looking, nice guy, preferably with a muscular hairy chest and you want to actually go on a date, a real date, then leave me a message.  Age is totally open, but no retirees please. ”

After I posted that message, I went into to the ACME chat lounge.   Within a few minutes, I had a chat request from a guy name John.    We chatted for a while and he seems like a nice guy.    We are going to chat again tomorrow night and see what happens….


So, I met that guy John from the ACME Chat Lounge for coffee tonight.   He was really nice, and cute, but we just didn’t have sexual chemistry.   Actually, I think we will end up being friends, because we have a lot in common, and there was never a lull in the conversation.   They always say you can never have too many friends, and I believe that.   Funny story though, I actually met a guy a few months ago who didn’t agree with that philosophy.    We chatted on the phone a few times, and things seemed to click.   We decided to meet for lunch (don’t do that, meet for a drink or coffee first before committing to a meal  together).   As soon as he showed up at the restaurant, I realized that he just wasn’t my type and I wasn’t attracted to him.   We did have a fun lunch, and he was a nice guy, but I just didn’t feel a spark romantically.  At the end of the lunch, he said he really like me, and would like to go on a date.   I hate moments like this, but honesty is the best policy, so I said that I had a fun time, but just didn’t feel a spark, and would like to be friends.   He actually responded, “Well, no thanks, I have enough friends.”  Then he gets up and leaves.   Some men are so immature.



After another bad date last night, I started thinking that someone should lay down a set of rules when it comes to dating.   Here is my first attempt:

1)      Shower before going on a date

2)      Make sure your car is clean

3)      Don’t have garlic at lunch before you have a date that night

4)      Don’t talk about your ex on a first date (or second or third)

5)      Show up on time

6)      Don’t lie about your age

Thanks Justin.  That’s all for this week.  Thanks for all the comments you have been leaving. Keep em up.

Checking out.  It’s Biff and Julie – The Acme Chatters.

Guest Blogger – Justin – Gay Man – Part 1

Hello it’s Biff and Julie -The Acme Chatters

This week we introduce our first guest blogger – Justin.  We’ll let him tell his story.


Hi boys.   My name is Justin.   I am a single 22 and a half year old gay man, and like so many young gay guys, I am looking for Mr. Right, I think.   I say, I think, because I am having a lot of fun being single, but I also want to be in love.  All of my older friends (who are in their 30’s and 40’s) keep telling me to relax, enjoy myself, experience life, and love will happen when I am ready.   It is certainly not from lack of trying.  I really put myself out there and am open to whatever happens.   I am on the ACME Chatline and some unmentionable websites.   I also go to a gay gym, gay bars, gay restaurants, and have a large inner circle of friends who constantly want to set me up with one of their friends.   They always say it happens when you least expect it, and I am tired of hearing that.   Maybe Mr. Right now would hit the spot, at least tonight.   Gonna call ACME now and see who is in the mood to chat tonight.  Happy hunting…I will update soon.


Tonight, I did not want to go out to the bars, or out to dinner, so I stopped by the grocery store, and bought some chicken and salad for dinner.   I am so over going to the bars.   There are always so many guys in the bars who are drunk, or worse, and I just do not want a guy who is a mess.  Being so young, every time I go to bars, all these old men hit on me.  Don’t get me wrong, I like a hot Daddy now and then, lol.   What was I saying, oh yeah, I stayed home.   So, after dinner, I started wondering who was on the chatline, so I called ACME.    There were some nice guys, and like me, there was a guy who just wanted to have phone sex.   So, we did, and it was really hot.   Sometimes, it is easier and less hassle to just have phone sex.   Fantasy is so cool, and you can make phone sex about whatever your heart desires.   Hmmm… I think I will call again.


Dating can be totally exhausting.   I feel like I have been on so many bad dates and I am only 22.  Well, really I am 22 and a half.   Last week, my friend Tyler set me up on a blind date with his boyfriend’s roommate.    Tyler had pointed him out before in the gym, but I had never met him.   He is a good looking guy, so I agreed.  Well, let me tell you, it was a disaster.  He came over to pick me up, and he smelled like he had been drinking.   Then, when we hugged hello, he grabbed my ass.   We were in the car on the way to dinner when I suddenly realized this was a mistake, and I didn’t even want to go to dinner with him.  I asked him to pull over, and I walked home.    I hate blind dates, especially when setup by a friend.   Now, how am I going to tell Tyler that the date was awful, especially since he arranged it?   Thanks, but no thanks, I will find dates on my own.   Before going to bed that night, I called ACME and had an interesting chat with a cool guy before going to sleep.   Stay tuned, we are going out this weekend.

We will hear back from Justin next week.

That’s all for now from Biff and Julie (and Justin) – The Acme Chatters.

More Questions

Hi again! It’s Biff and Julie – The Acme Chatters

Well last week’s blog about some of the strange terms used on telephone datelines was popular, so we thought we’d discuss a few more terms that might not be obvious to everyone.

“Bi-Curious” – This refers to a male, who considers himself to be straight, but who has some sexual feelings towards other men.  He’s not sure what it means, but he is “curious”.  The term is equally applicable to women.

“Meet and Greet” – Originally this term comes from church socials where groups of people who probably don’t already know each other very well get together in a casual situation to get to know each other in non-threatening circumstances.  When used by someone on a telephone dateline, they probably mean that they want to meet someone in casual circumstances without a lot of pressure.  Maybe just a cup of coffee at the coffee shop.  They are looking for less than a full-fledged date (although it might evolve into one).  They are also not looking for a quick hook-up.

“No Strings-Attached Hookup” – They are looking for quick sex and don’t want to feel obligated to even call you again.  If that’s not your cup of tea, then you can just skip right by him or her.  At least they are being honest.

“Top” “Bottom” and “Versatile” – These are terms used by gay men.  A top prefers to participate in anal sex in the active position.  A bottom prefers to participate in anal sex in the passive position.  If he’s versatile, he likes it both ways.  If this doesn’t clear it up for you, do an internet search.  That should remove all doubt.


ANSWER: That’s a good question.  From the beginning, Acme has had both gay and straight people working for it.  As such, we do not feel as big a need to segregate people by sexual orientation.  In the past, we have had separate gay versus straight systems, but the mixed systems proved to be more popular.  Also, it is our impression that the number of people who are bi-curious (see definition above) and bisexual is far greater than most people realize.  Some people like to cross back and forth across that nebulous line.


ANSWER: Some chatlines and datelines require paid time to use any and all features on their system. At Acme, only a few features require Acme Credits – everything else is always free! If you have Acme Credits in your account and start to use a “paid” feature, the system will let you know when charges begin and when charges end. The system will also tell you how many Acme Credits you were charged. 200 Acme Credits equals 1 minute of time using a paid feature and it charges in 30 second intervals – we will never charge more than 200 Acme Credits per minute, but sometimes we may have specials where we will charge use less than 200 Acme Credits per minute – kinda like Happy Hour specials.

Biff:  I heard rumor that there may be some Happy Hour specials coming soon.


ANSWER: One way that a telephone dateline can get revenue to pay its bills  is to have the phone company pay them for generating calls.  Before the prevalence of virtually unlimited cell phone minutes, when local and long-distance calls were metered, some phone companies would be willing to pay a very small fraction of a cent per minute just for having people use the telephone lines.  With those arrangements they could make the entire chatlines totally free and pay for their costs with these phone companies fees.

Julie: I called one of those totally free chatlines recently and it was a horrible experience.  It was busy all right, but filled with creeps.  I created a vague chatline greeting because I really just wanted to listen to what was going on with the chatline.  I was bombarded with constant chat requests from guys who couldn’t possibly know any more about me other than I was female.  After ten minutes, I was so frustrated, I hung up.  I didn’t want to talk to any of these guys and they wouldn’t leave me alone.  You definitely get what you pay for with an all-free system.

Biff: One cool feature that we recently added to The Acme Dating Company, is window-shopping.  When you first call into the system, instead of creating a mailbox and posting a public ad, you can just go onto the system anonymously and listen to public ads.  You can’t send messages or participate because you really are invisible to everyone else and don’t have a mailbox.  At any time you can create a mailbox and start participating. 

Julie:  It lets you listen in to who is on the system before you commit yourself to anything.  And also, when you do create a new mailbox, if you are a first-time user, you get 1000 free Acme Credits (that five minutes of pay features).

Anyway, that’s all for this week.

Signing off.  Biff and Julie – The Acme Chatters